Product Review: Military Special Rum

Photo Credit: Ground Control to Major Mom
Photo Credit: Ground Control to Major Mom

My estate-sale friend nabbed a bottle of this for me a couple of weeks ago. The previous owner was a former serviceman and in turn, had collected hundreds of military-related items over the years. With her being told to get rid of or take anything that would not sell, she knew I would appreciate a bottle of the sinister-named “Military Special Rum”. I was told it is (or once was) only available at commissaries, but after doing some research online, I am not sure that is true. Either way, it’s a cool bottle of something I had never seen before. Should it not be good, it could always be used in a cocktail, right? 

Think again. This Military Special Rum is one of the worst things I have ever drank in my life. Terrible, horrible, no good, very bad. Almost beyond comprehension. Okay, so it might not be worse than that strawberry-banana flavored Mad Dog 20/20 I had a few years ago in Virginia, but it’s getting there. How do I even describe the taste? To be kind, imagine a rum-flavored cheap vodka. That would be the most practical comparison. If you’re looking for abstract, how about jet fuel? I wouldn’t be surprised if I could start my car off a bottle of this stuff. While it looks dark in the bottle if sitting on a counter or shelf, if you hold it up to a light source, the color begins to resemble urine. But then again it is spiced rum. But spiced with what, turpentine?

However, this does have me curious. Do you think shaking this up in a cocktail would cause combustion and my untimely death? It’s possible. What a way to go out that would be! Sorry Lynn, this one is no bueno. I pity the livers of anyone who drinks this stuff straight.

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